Full Throttle

First congrats to Carl Edwards on a phenominal weekend. Roush must feel a bit of vindication after catching some flack in the press over hiring Edwards. But that’s enough of the good out of Atlanta, on with this weeks ” cesspool swimmers.”

FoxSports make-up artist: Did Jeff Hammond even visit the make-up trailer before the broadcast? Or did Fox think by allowing the bright white around his eyes might cause the audience to stay awake long enough to hear “gentilemen start your engines?” Come on, those white eyes in contrast to the tanned face made him look like a photo negitive of a racoon!

NASCAR: Maybe I missed something. Aren’t the flags that are waved from the starters stand called “competition flags?” Since when is it part of NASCAR’s mandate to use a black flag to communicate with a driver - who lost use of his radio -to pit for fuel?

Dale Jarrett: Dale did a “double dip” in the cesspool after two consecutive pits stops earned him speeding penalties.

To whomever said: (Sorry I don’t remember who) “Should drivers have a better system to determine pit road speed?” Well…duh. I guess maybe! And they are installed by default on every Briggs & Stratton lawn mower in the country. It’s called a rev limiter! Millions of dollars spent each year in at minimum, 43 shops, and they can’t figure out a way utilze what has been on pathetic little one cylider 2 stroke engines for decades. Geeesh, get with the program guys!

Hendrick engine shop: Joe Nemechek may have lost a top five finish in Atlanta as a result of a blown engine, the second after a similar result in Fontana.

Jeff Gordon, Bobby Labonte, Mike Wallace, John Andretti, Ricky Rudd, and Robby Gordon As a result of poor Atlanta finishes this illustrious group of six find themselves headed to Bristol all needing to garner enough points to remain in the top 35. Failing that, they get no “free pass” and must make the Martinville field the following week on qual times alone. Lots’a luck with that.

32nd, 39th, 43rd: Shane Hmiel’s Atlanta finishes that, although early in the year, put him in the running for the year end “Cesspool Award.”

And with that, another stinking dip in NASCAR’s cesspool closes for the week.

I didn’t get a chance to view todays race due to mandatory attendence at a birthday party. Soooo… here are the results without comment. Well almost. Two races, four points positions for Red Bull and Villeneuve still sucks. He won’t last more than two more events! With luck Star Sports will be showing a replay of the race in about an hour.

Pos Driver Team Engine Car Tyre Laps Gap
1 Alonso Renault Renault R25 M 56 1h 31:33.736
2 Trulli Toyota Toyota TF105 M 56 +24:327
3 Heidfeld Williams BMW FW27 M 56 +32.188
4 Montoya McLaren Mercedes MP4-20 M 56 +41.631
5 R Schumacher Toyota Toyota TF105 M 56 +51.854
6 Coulthard Red Bull Cosworth RB1 M 56 +1:12.543
7 M Schumacher Ferrari Ferrari F2004M B 56 +1:19.988
8 Klien Red Bull Cosworth RB1 M 56 +1:20.835
9 Raikkonen McLaren Mercedes MP4-20 M 56 +1:21.580
10 Massa Sauber Petronas C24 M 55 +1 Lap
11 Karthikeyan Jordan Toyota EJ15 B 54 +2 Laps
12 Monteiro Jordan Toyota EJ15 B 53 +3 Laps
13 Albers Minardi Cosworth PS04B B 52 +4 Laps
14 Barrichello Ferrari Ferrari F2004M B 49 Retired
15 Fisichella Renault Renault R25 M 36 Accident
16 Webber Williams BMW FW27 M 36 Accident
17 Villeneuve Sauber Petronas C24 M 26 Spin
18 Button BAR Honda BAR007 M 2 Engine
19 Davidson BAR Honda BAR007 M 2 Engine
20 Friesacher Minardi Cosworth PS04B B 2 Spin

Fastest Lap: Raikkonen 1:35.483

There

Before I get to my note for Dale Jr fans you’ll note this has been filed under a new category, “NASCAR Cesspool.”

This category will be dedicated to drivers, crew chiefs, pit crew members, and TV commentators. Each week one or more may be entered “into the cesspool ” thru their on-track or off-track actions. As you may have guesstimated by the name, entry isn’t a good thing and the chances of swimming in the pool and visiting victory lane are slim to none!

Las Vegas Cesspool:

Dale Earnhradt Jr. (And incidently my note to Jr. fans) Jr. must be dumb as a toolchest full of box wrenches! With only 12 laps into a race how on earth do you pull such a stupid move? After a pitiful 32^nd place finish in Fontana and a 34^th starting position Sunday one would think discretion would be the better part of valor. But no, he has to act like it was a green white checker situation. STUPID. And a well deserved 27^th position in the point stands!

Matt Kenseth went snorkling thru the feces by staying out on track despite an extreme tire rub. He sunk to the bottom a few laps later when the same tire gave out. Also very stupid.

Robby Gordon’s engine shop earns a quick dip in “the pool” as his new motor program has produced more “handgrenade” explosions than John Wayne in The Longest Day.

Mike Bliss stopped deep in his pit, which left tire carrier Mike Morneo out to dry. As a result he was hit by Tony Stewart as he entered his box, and in turn a bouncing tire then smacked one of Stewart’s pit crew, Jody Fortson.

That puts the lid on this weeks edition of the cesspool. But keep in mind nominations are open throughout the week as everyone prepares for “Hotlanta” this weekend.

Read the rest of this entry »

Lineup for the UAW-DaimlerChrysler 400 Car number in parentheses

1. (12) Ryan Newman, Dodge, 173.745 mph.
2. (38) Elliott Sadler, Ford, 173.712.
3. (16) Greg Biffle, Ford, 173.182.
4. (10) Scott Riggs, Chevrolet, 171.920.
5. (97) Kurt Busch, Ford, 171.865.
6. (77) Travis Kvapil, Dodge, 171.717.
7. (9) Kasey Kahne, Dodge, 171.527.
8. (17) Matt Kenseth, Ford, 170.946.
9. (48) Jimmie Johnson, Chevrolet, 170.848.
10. (5) Kyle Busch, Chevrolet, 170.832.
11. (24) Jeff Gordon, Chevrolet, 170.336.
12. (01) Joe Nemechek, Chevrolet, 170.283.
13. (88) Dale Jarrett, Ford, 169.934.
14. (49) Ken Schrader, Dodge, 169.886.
15. (41) Casey Mears, Dodge, 169.854.
16. (32) Bobby Hamilton Jr., Chevrolet, 169.817.
17. (11) Jason Leffler, Chevrolet, 169.806.
18. (0) Mike Bliss, Chevrolet, 169.753.
19. (6) Mark Martin, Ford, 169.465.
20. (99) Carl Edwards, Ford, 169.258.
21. (2) Rusty Wallace, Dodge, 169.226.
22. (42) Jamie McMurray, Dodge, 169.199.
23. (20) Tony Stewart, Chevrolet, 169.173.
24. (31) Jeff Burton, Chevrolet, 169.125.
25. (40) Sterling Marlin, Dodge, 169.051.
26. (19) Jeremy Mayfield, Dodge, 168.993.
27. (7) Robby Gordon, Chevrolet, 168.729.
28. (22) Scott Wimmer, Dodge, 168.676.
29. (07) Dave Blaney, Chevrolet, 168.503.
30. (4) Mike Wallace, Chevrolet, 168.439.
31. (18) Bobby Labonte, Chevrolet, 168.345.
32. (25) Brian Vickers, Chevrolet, 167.937.
33. (21) Ricky Rudd, Ford, 167.717.
34. (8) Dale Earnhardt Jr., Chevrolet, 167.198.
35. (45) Kyle Petty, Dodge, 167.017.
36. (15) Michael Waltrip, Chevrolet, 166.631.
37. (14) John Andretti, Ford, 166.164.
38. (34) Randy LaJoie, Chevrolet, 165.787.
39. (43) Jeff Green, Dodge, 165.695.
40. (66) Hermie Sadler, Ford, 165.350.
41. (73) Eric McClure, Chevrolet, 165.279.
42. (29) Kevin Harvick, Chevrolet, time disallowed.
43. (89) Morgan Shepherd, Dodge, 165.234.

Failed to qualify: 44. (09) Johnny Sauter, Dodge, 165.163, 45. (37) Kevin Lepage, Dodge, 164.810, 46. (92) Stanton Barrett, Chevrolet, 164.444, 47. (79) Stan Boyd, Chevrolet, 164.424, 48. (00) Carl Long, Chevrolet, 162.660, 49. (27) Kirk Shelmerdine, Ford. Read the rest of this entry »

Story via Fox Sports Australia.

CONTROVERSIAL Formula One qualifying rules used for the first time at last weekend’s Australian Grand Prix could already be in line for changes.

The rules, involving grid positions based on the aggregate of two separate sessions, have drawn a barrage of criticim from teams and drivers. Ferrari says the sport seems to be stumbling from “poor solution to poor solution” while Red Bull racer David Coulthard called them “farcical”.

And McLaren driver Juan Pablo Montoya has complained that Formula One fans are being short-changed.

Ferrari qualified poorly because of a downpour shortly before the cars ran but technical director Ross Brawn says the rules will need modifying if they continue to prove dull. Brawn said another two races should be enough to decide whether the regulations needed to be tweaked. “Clearly Australia wasn’t a good example,” Brawn told F1Racing .net.

“But I’d say that Malaysia, or maybe Bahrain, when we can see it running normally, if we don’t see a reasonable spectacle, then things might be considered again. “We seem to be going from poor solution to poor solution.”

Montoya said now that tyres needed to last through qualifying as well as the race, drivers were loath to press too hard for fear of damaging them. “Yeah, well, you’re trying to save the tyre, so it’s not the most exciting thing,” he said. “You’re just keeping it on the track. “I think it’s disappointing for the fans who pay their money. I think the big problems is that people don’t understand what’s going on.”

Fourth-placed Coulthard, a winner from the qualifying format, was nevertheless scathing about the new system. “It totally benefited us, but it’s not really what we’re here to see. It was kind of farcical,” Coulthard said. “There’s no point watching the first (Saturday) qualifying hour anymore, as it’s all decided in the pre-race qualifying session.

“It should be one hour, four laps and you’ve got to do a lap in every 15 minutes with all the cars out there.”

Meanwhile, Coulthard emphasised that the Red Bull team’s effort in Melbourne