Smoke? - As a Pit Reporter?
Tony Stewart will work as a SPEED pit reporter during the Nextel Open at LMS, a qualifying event that moves the top two finishers forward into the Nextel All-Star Challenge.
Nextel Cup Series drivers #99-Carl Edwards, #18-J.J. Yeley and #84-A.J. Allmendinger have all agreed to make themselves available as SPEED pit reporters for the Nextel All-Star Challenge if they do not advance to the main event.
So, any guesses how Tony will play this? He could mock some of the over-paid automatons that currently hold the job and mimic their canned questions and remain oblivious to the answers they receive:
Smoke: “Thanks guys, I’m with Greg Erwin crew chief of the #7 of Robbie Gordon. Greg you kinda caught a huge break with that yellow and the Lucky Mongrel put you back within 2 laps of the leader, what’s Robbie saying about the car?”
Erwin: “Yeah, well Robbie said some kinda somethin’ flew out of the window just before that yellow, but other than that the car runs fine, for a Ford”
Smoke: “Your stop was a little slow, what happened?”
Erwin: “Well yeah Tony, we had to replace some, ah… ‘needed equipment.’” We lost a couple seconds but Robbie says a couple more yellows and he’ll be just fine, and I believe him, he’s very ‘resourceful’ driver you know”
Smoke: “Thanks Greg, think I’ll wait here for the next yellow, guys back to you in the booth.”
10 laps later Speed gets the “real” Smoke:
Smoke: “About time you booth jerks sent it down here, I’m sweatin’ my frickin’ ass off and you guys are smoochin’ Humpy’s backside in the cool of what amounts to a luxury suite.
“Anyway, I’m in the David Reutimann pits with Frank Kerr crew chief of the #00 Toyota.”
“Frank how’s the double zero running?”
Kerr: “Tony as you know we took your advice, during the last restart we cued up Mikey’s radio and told him NASCAR agreed to erase his points deficit and award him another 100 points if he could keep that Heap on the lead lap.”
“Worked like a charm, Mikey missed a shift on the restart and blew that Toy sky high, thanks Tony”
Smoke: “Not a problem Frank, back to you bobbleheads in the ice-cold booth, I’m making for the motorcoach. The WWE is on… um, er, I mean the race is on closed-circuit. Call my cell if ya need me”
NASCAR, Tony Stewart, NEXTEL Cup, Speed TV, Auto Racing, Motorsports, Full Throttle
I think I just missed a shift. That was the funniest thing I’ve seen all week.
NO, that was Mikey that missed the shift. Could it be you sprayed your favorite “beverage” on your monitor?
But thanks for the compliment Charlie.