1st June 2007

Stop the Presses the Earth IS FLAT!

posted in NASCAR |

And in other news not to be believed… Michael Waltrip won’t go “1 fer ‘07″ as some had expected or wished for.

Maybe it was Toyota’s re-vamped engine that created Mikey’s resurgence into a starting field, although that flys in the face of previous attempts that were fast enough but the #55 was a victim of the Anointed 35 Rule.

The seriously deluded will look at that starting line-up and note the close proximity of Mikey and teammate Dale Jarrett. The obvious conclusion to be drawn is Jarrett via some magical chain-linked cloaking device actually qualified while towing the then invisible and closely linked #55 around The Monster. As proof they will point to the nearly identical laps times (0.002 gap or the approximate length of 5ft of chain) of the #55 and #44.

… or Mikey traded a “starting spot to be named later” with Dave Blaney whose Toyota missed its first starting line-up in a dogs age.

Regardless, it’s good to see Waltrip get a chance to perform on a Sunday, but the way his luck has been since Daytona it wouldn’t be surprising to see the #55 taken out by someone within the first 5 laps.

IN OTHER NEWS: What elixir has gotten into the Dodge Boys? Six of the first twelve starters for Sunday’s Cup race are of the MoPar variety with Rocket Ryan leading the way to the green.

IN NEWS of SINKING SHIPS, reportedly Paul Menard is pulling his support of DEI (Don’t Expect Interest). I wouldn’t call Menard a “rat” but if the report is true he’s looking over the gunwales of the U.S.S. Teresa at the water below in the hope of seeing a life raft float by. Whether that “raft” will be from the Robbie Gordon organization is a matter for considerable debate I’m not willing to get into at the moment.

I’ll wait for confirmation, then launch a volley of torpedoes.

AND FINALLY: In a story so disgusting it should be avoided, I simply… can’t.

I’m forgiving of a lot of things. You want to be a race driver, do drugs then get caught? Go ahead, I’ll report it, call you an asshatted dumb sh*t but you’ll be forgiven and I’ll move on.

It you want to “cheat” or really cheat, it will be noted and forgiven.

However, whether you be one of NASCAR’s brightest lights or someone scrambling to make its field of dreams on a hope and a prayer, if you are one of the two that have issued letters in support of this despicable sub-human you have lost an enormous amount of my respect and you can go to hell in a hand basket. And frankly I don’t want to know who you are. Stay anonymous, please!

UPDATE: So much for the Dodge Boy’s elixir bottle, they must have dropped it. There are only two Dodges in the top twelve, Newman & Labonte, after the second practice.


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This entry was posted on Friday, June 1st, 2007 at 6:00 pm and is filed under NASCAR. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.

There are currently 9 responses to “Stop the Presses the Earth IS FLAT!”

Why not let us know what you think by adding your own comment! Your opinion is as valid as anyone elses. (Except mine, it takes precedence over all!)

  1. 1 On June 2nd, 2007, Paul Hamilton said:#

    Elixir? Chevy was doing too well and the NASCAR Deities of Mediocrity ruled that the others must catch up.

  2. 2 On June 2nd, 2007, peterg said:#

    This is not me in jester mode Marc.

    I would seriously like to know what low life’s felt fit to provide the scum with letters of support.

  3. 3 On June 2nd, 2007, Marc said:#

    There’s part of me that wants to know Peter and another that says it’s not worth the aggravation.

    I’ll just leave it at the scum that was guilty is getting what he deserves. (although I would have given him a life sentence )

  4. 4 On June 3rd, 2007, Dawnya said:#

    I am a HUGE nascar fan, but first and foremost I am a parent. These drivers that have supported this man, do they have kids, and if so are they willing to leave them in his care? I DONT THINK SO!!!! I pray that they are not the drivers that I am so fond of, but if they are and they come forward, I WILL definately find a new team to support.
    There are plenty of women in the world that will be with a man, whether it be a relationship or one night stand. He could have found a consenting adult to fill his needs, even if he had to pay her. I have never understood what could possible turn on a grown man about a child. That is just disgusting.

  5. 5 On June 3rd, 2007, Kasey said:#

    It is beyond disgusting that people would support this creep. I hope it comes out who they are.

  6. 6 On June 3rd, 2007, Marc said:#

    Dawnya, Kasey, it’s far beyond my comprehension why someone would support the guy.

    I have to say also without knowing the content of the letters it’s very hard to determine what really occurred.

    Considering who may be involved (Kyle Petty, Bobby Labonte and John Andretti were all represented by the guys PR firm) the letters may just state how he performed his assigned role as a PR guy while condemning his abhorrent actions.

    I wouldn’t have done it, but if that is what happened it’s their choice and if confirmed I suspect they would rue the day they wrote any type of letter.

  7. 7 On June 5th, 2007, becky said:#

    we all seriously want to know WHO wrote letters of support for williams. WE want to know NOW!! someone needs to find out WHO , so we can get on with the business of running them out of NASCAR.

  8. 8 On June 5th, 2007, Marc said:#

    Jumping the gun a bit aren’t you Becky?

    As I wrote in comment #6 no one but the court and lawyers involved know what was contained in the letters, it may very well be simple statements regarding his job performance and nothing to do with the crime involved.

    That aside, by what NASCAR rule would you banish the letter writers from NASCAR?

    You’re dreaming Becky, wake up.

  9. 9 On June 5th, 2007, rebecca_at_home said:#

    As the mother of the victim I have to say that you guys don’t have a clue what kind of sick, perverted monster Richard Williams really is. To sit in that courtroom last Friday and listen to letters of support, including those who said they would hire Richard Williams tomorrow, made me FURIOUS and SICK! As far as the NASCAR drivers who pledge their support and begged the judge to give him a second chance, they obviously do not have an inclining of the torture and abuse Richard Williams inflicted on my daughter! Who in their right mind and moral conscience can support with open arms a sick child molester like “Chip” Williams???? No one, including his wife (who says she will not seek a divorce and will continue to wear her wedding ring) has a clue to how disgusting this “man” is. And for the record, the names of the NASCAR drivers were not revealed in open court. Has anyone noticed how those same drivers haven’t come forth publicly to show support of Mr. Williams???

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