Stop the Presses the Earth IS FLAT!
And in other news not to be believed… Michael Waltrip won’t go “1 fer ‘07″ as some had expected or wished for.
Maybe it was Toyota’s re-vamped engine that created Mikey’s resurgence into a starting field, although that flys in the face of previous attempts that were fast enough but the #55 was a victim of the Anointed 35 Rule.
The seriously deluded will look at that starting line-up and note the close proximity of Mikey and teammate Dale Jarrett. The obvious conclusion to be drawn is Jarrett via some magical chain-linked cloaking device actually qualified while towing the then invisible and closely linked #55 around The Monster. As proof they will point to the nearly identical laps times (0.002 gap or the approximate length of 5ft of chain) of the #55 and #44.
… or Mikey traded a “starting spot to be named later” with Dave Blaney whose Toyota missed its first starting line-up in a dogs age.
Regardless, it’s good to see Waltrip get a chance to perform on a Sunday, but the way his luck has been since Daytona it wouldn’t be surprising to see the #55 taken out by someone within the first 5 laps.
IN OTHER NEWS: What elixir has gotten into the Dodge Boys? Six of the first twelve starters for Sunday’s Cup race are of the MoPar variety with Rocket Ryan leading the way to the green.
IN NEWS of SINKING SHIPS, reportedly Paul Menard is pulling his support of DEI (Don’t Expect Interest). I wouldn’t call Menard a “rat” but if the report is true he’s looking over the gunwales of the U.S.S. Teresa at the water below in the hope of seeing a life raft float by. Whether that “raft” will be from the Robbie Gordon organization is a matter for considerable debate I’m not willing to get into at the moment.
I’ll wait for confirmation, then launch a volley of torpedoes.
AND FINALLY: In a story so disgusting it should be avoided, I simply… can’t.
I’m forgiving of a lot of things. You want to be a race driver, do drugs then get caught? Go ahead, I’ll report it, call you an asshatted dumb sh*t but you’ll be forgiven and I’ll move on.
It you want to “cheat” or really cheat, it will be noted and forgiven.
However, whether you be one of NASCAR’s brightest lights or someone scrambling to make its field of dreams on a hope and a prayer, if you are one of the two that have issued letters in support of this despicable sub-human you have lost an enormous amount of my respect and you can go to hell in a hand basket. And frankly I don’t want to know who you are. Stay anonymous, please!
UPDATE: So much for the Dodge Boy’s elixir bottle, they must have dropped it. There are only two Dodges in the top twelve, Newman & Labonte, after the second practice.
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