Full Throttle

After some asshatted aides on the staff of the Homeland Security Committee decided NASCAR Nation was riddled with all manor of diseases known to mankind (and probably some that aren’t) the Editorial Staff of Charlotte Observer listed the top five reasons why you should have your shot record up to date before passing through the gates of Lowes Motor Speedway:

• 5. Diseases spread quickly in large crowds — especially if some nut’s throwing chicken bones.
• 4. It’ll help NASCAR recruit more drug companies as sponsors
• 3. Alcohol used externally is an antiseptic; alcohol used internally is not.
• 2. Cabarrus County is not a Third World country, but the mosquitoes don’t know that.
• 1. Bruton Smith may bite somebody — again. (Like the Concord City Council - ed)

Amen brother… AMEN!